Drink and Blog

I discovered that if I drink before I write the brewery updates they are so much more interesting and truthful. :)

So, here's to getting drunk and writing! It also helps excuse my poor grammar.

The week before last, I kidnapped my mom and took her on a stint of the Santa Cruz Mountain Brewing Traveling Circus. We have gotten so good at rolling into town in the middle of night, setting up our DISPLAY in mere minutes and putting on our SCHTICK that we have dubbed ourselves 'BEER CARNIES' ~ The impressive truth is that I actually have real CARNIE in my blood, but that is better left for another storytelling event.

The first leg of our adventure started in VACAVILLE where we met with John Power, the owner of BUTTE CREEK BREWING to talk beer business, the recent article about ORGANIC BEER on the Associated Press (where Butte was featured), and the future of organic brewing in a market where ANHUESER-BUSCH is trying to pass off an organic BUDWEISER in a brown bottle, interestingly named, WILD HOP. They are marketing it as brewed by Green Valley Brewing (which is the road and exit you take off HWY 80 in Antioch, where the huge AB brewing facility is located). I have tried WILD HOP. It tastes like BUD. Don't tell this to their marketing department, but I think it would have been much more clever and successful if they had put it in a BUDWEISER can and slapped ORGANIC on it. People would have appreciated it much more. ORGANIC CONSUMERS HATE TO BE FOOLED. They also have a great sense of humor.

My mom and I were tooling around in my Dad's truck which was full of kegs and EXPO crap. As we were cruising up the 5 corridor in the HOT SUMMER SUN, with no air conditioning, the windows rolled down and wind roaring through our conversations, Chad called.

"JJ Jackson called," he said. "There are going to be between 3000 and 5000 people there tomorrow."

I figured that I didn't hear him correctly with the loud roar of traffic and the motor. Couldn't be. We were set to pour beer the next day in Sacramento for a group of press folks and media types at a sort of pre-party to the California State Fair. The email had stated that breweries who had placed First in a division were invited to a gathering at the fairgrounds and to bring 15 gallons of our award winning beer. 15 gallons wouldn't be enough for 5000 folks. Not in the hot, hot heat of Sacramento. Not to worry, my mom and I are great at being STINGY with beer tasting. :) More importantly, our casual attire and laissez fair attitudes had to make some quick adjustments.

We made it to Chico to drop of our kegs, hit our hotel, visited Butte Brewing, and then we went to the CHICO mall to procure a dress since my usual attire of jeans and beer t-shirt would likely not be appropriate for the 'Grape and Gourmet'. After searching for far too long, purchasing, changing our minds, returning and then purchasing again, we settled on a simple black dress that wouldn't wrinkle, was slightly sophisticated (at least for me), and was lightweight in the event our expo wasn't air conditioned.

My mom had never visited the 'Land of Canaan' of breweries, the mighty SIERRA NEVADA, so I gave her an afterhours tour (basically the perimeter of the grounds, the hop fields, the copper kettles and the hop room). Then we settled down for a sampler of what SIERRA had on tap. So many beers to try ~ so little time. Our favorite was the RUTHLESS HEFEWEIZEN. What a wild bunch of flavors - true CLOVE and BANANA. Our second favorite was the PALE BOCK, without reading the alcohol content you would have never known that it was one of their highest beers.

Without wasting too much time chronicling the JACKASS FRAT BOYS in the pool that night (who beckoned for a date with my fist), I will proceed to the noteworthy event the next day. The Grape and Gourmet... By the way - when are we ever going to get our EVENT - HOP and GOURMET - or MALT and GOURMET... Jeeeeezzz, I am getting tired of playing second fiddle to the damn grapes of this world. :)

In the HOT SUMMER HEAT of the Sacramento Sun we got our expo crap unloaded and set up at our table. Then, upon finding out that we weren't needed at our booth for a few hours, we set off to find our hotel. We grabbed a drink at the bar and drank it while we floated in the pool. It may sound like a lame excuse, but it always takes me a bit of 'liquid courage' and in this case - a refreshing soak - to ease the stress of doing a tasting of this nature. We floated and tried to imagine, 'What kinds of questions are they going to ask me this time?'

Back in our hotel room, we rushed to get ready for the event. We had dilly dallied for a little too long. Walking out of the bathroom after I had dried my hair, my mom made the statement that would end up becoming the comedic refrain of our whole trip. "Hurry up, put on your dress." But where was my dress? We searched everywhere, suitcases ripped apart, the truck double and triple checked. The dress was nowhere to be found. In less than 12 hours, I had lost my dress.

She had, however, found a cowboy hat, and a crumpled up little ball of a dress that I had shoved in a corner of my suitcase, god knows when. She furiously ironed while I took deep breaths. I hadn't worn that dress in close to ten years and the damn thing was shorter than short. How was I going to talk to beer nerds in that thing? Add the cowboy hat, the three inch sandals and you can only imagine. THINK CIRCUS FREAK. That was me.

Running late and filled with a new set of fears and anxieties, we practically sprinted into the expo event. People were already milling around and tasting for the "exclusive, press pre-pour." Approaching the table where we had left all of our belongings was an ABRUPT and TERRIFYING intermission to our already exciting day. We had been DISPLACED. We searched the 400 booths looking for our stuff. For a reason, I still don't recall, we had been moved and now we would be sharing a table with Sierra Nevada. Kismet.

I frantically set about the business of hooking up the jockey box, only to discover that the CO2 regulator that the boys at the brewery had sent was rusted beyond hope. There was no way to turn it down. I practically burst into tears. The guys from Sierra Nevada tried to help but it was useless. There we were, the CIRCUS FREAK with the FOAMY award winning brown ale and her mom. People kept approaching our table to try my beer, but in my true BEER NAZI form, I sent them away. I couldn't have them tasting FOAM.

Then, by the grace of the beer angels in heaven, or maybe the higher altitude combined with coils finally reaching their chilled temperature, the DREAD BROWN ALE started pouring perfectly. I chugged a glass, then chugged a bottle of SUMMERFEST (thanks to the SN guys) and the rest is history. I don't remember much, but I know I ate so many BBQ RIBS that BIG JOE (the BBQ GUY on the right of our booth) said, "GIRL, YOU EAT A LOT."

It was a great night - lots of beer nerds and fake boobs. But don't tell the boys back at the brewery, or they will want to come next time.